When I was young I was naive. I was going to be celibate and save the world and give my entire life to the poor. The more I saw of the world and families and children the more desire I had for a family. I made a choice to walk away from a life of service and choose what I thought was a meaningful goal.
When I was young I thought that marriage was a joining of the physical and the spiritual. I thought that a man and a woman stood before all their family and God and professed their love and commitment to each other. I believed the Lord would see this and bless this union and solidify it until death do us part.
As a husband I had a job. To love, to hold, to to honor, to obey for the entirety of my life.
But I failed to do my job, And my union was never blessed. It was created upon a lie and it just inflamed and necrose like a huge puss filled cyst.
Marriage I now understand is a device created by the State to allow to individuals who have made a contract towards similar goals to file joint taxes, to share health care, and to progress as long as the contract seems reasonable to both parties. At any time one is able to break the contract.
I have been wrong in so many ways thru my life. Society makes me sick. I still don't understand how I can have been fooled for so long.
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